Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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