scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Oh god it's open bar.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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