His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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