guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
