Me too!
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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