He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize