Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I CAN MOONWALK!
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
