Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Two words: nipple clamps
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