I forgot how hot balto sounded
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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