brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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