so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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