So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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