your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize