he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
