i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
