READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
