ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Randomize
