His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
