I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Randomize
