Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
