well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
