last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
farters have to be the big spoon...
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Do you have feelings for this penis?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
