Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Randomize