how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Pants are for mortals
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize