I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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