he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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