Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
