69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
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