Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
porn star boner night. come get it.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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