Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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