oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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