Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
