I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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