I'd wear matching sweaters with you
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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