69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
