My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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