If that was your dad, he is hot
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
