if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
