Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
