So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
