absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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