He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize
