i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
