yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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