so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize