Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
