For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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