Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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