if we break up, who will get the dealer?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
