left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
